Miscellaneous Entertainment

I thought I’d compile a list of entertaining one-liners that I’ve heard relating to preservation. It’s raining here in Vermont and I think everyone could use a smile. Okay, maybe some are more than one-liners.

* Vinyl is final.

* Vinyl? It’s plastic. You covered your house in plastic.

* There is no such thing as maintenance-free; it means you can’t maintain it.

* A friend described the process of getting a bath fitter in his bathroom and ended it with “wham bam thank you ma’am.” Another friend and I looked at each other and decided this: Any action to a building that can be described as “wham bam thank you ma’am” is most likely a bad idea.

The aforementioned bath fitter is one of my biggest pet peeves about home remodeling, whether it is a historic, old, or new house, but especially for historic homes. What are your pet peeves? At the top of my list are:

1. vinyl replacement windows

2. vinyl siding

3. drop ceilings

4. baseboard heaters

5. bath fitters

What would you add to either list?